Saturday, April 10, 2010

What to Do With That Pesky MODERATED Spam That Just Keeps On Pouring in on This Poor Beleaguered Blog?


Play with it, like a cat toys with a mouse. Squash it. Pervert it.

Give it space, so...
Depending on what your destination is and how long you plan on making your trip for, the airfare may be the priciest expense. Did you know that Orion air now charges you to take a dump? No? Get used to it, kiddies. That’s the future. Because of this, finding a great deal on the airfare becomes extremely important. Maybe it’s time for the Great European Poop-in. Wear a diaper, fill it in flight, and then leave it under the seat. The more money you are able to save on the plane tickets, the more money you will be able to use toward Pampers and maybe even your actual vacation.

When it comes to purchasing your airline tickets, the sooner the better. You might as well throw your money down a rat hole. This goes for basically anywhere you plan on traveling. When you purchase a ticket sooner, lets say several months before the trip, the airline will still probably screw you over, so there will be less of a demand, which will drive the price of the ticket down because no one wants to fly in a bucket of bolts where you can’t heed the call of nature without forking over a Euro. However, on the flip side, as the day of the desired flight approaches, the flight's seats will begin to fill up--literally. But the smell will be so bad that more and many seats will become more inhospitable, and the higher the demand for TP and air freshener will be, which will drive the price up for potty time. Booking the flight in as far advance as you can may save you hundreds of dollars in the long run, blah, blah, blah, blah, but you’d better save $$$ for that highly competitive dash for the inflight Toi Toi.

Flying during the middle of the week is generally the cheapest time to fly, but avoid the Disney Screaming Brat Special. Fewer humans travel during mid week than on Friday through Sunday, but be careful: you may be assigned a seat next to a smelly pooch with continence issues. If at all possible, fly out on a Tuesday or Wednesday. You may have to settle for slap-dash plane maintenance, but that’s a small price to pay—you may actually find prices significantly less expensive on the Wednesday than the Sunday of the same week, but, evidently, flying on Saturdays has become downright dangerous, especially on Russian jets...

Looking for airfare online will probably be your best be [hit and run spammer can’t spell] at securing the cheapest possible flight price. There are multiple booking agencies which specialize in finding the cheapest airfare. However, to save time, go to [I’m not telling], which offers a comprehensive flight search option. [I’m not telling] will search other travel sites (yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, and yadda, etc.) and display the cheapest flight form (form? As in “Flight Formation”?) each site. From here [which you will never know] you will be able to decide which website offers the best deal. In your dreams

Students can often find discounted airfare by visiting [I thought that site went bankrupt and was up for auction. Who knew?]. This is the I’m-Not-Going-To-Let-you-Advertise-On-My-Blog-Association, and it will never allow you to find less expensive airfare for the traveling student, who is probably drunk on Mr Jekyll Absinthe, anyway. This isn't always the case, but it doesn't hurt to take a huge gulp.

So close, yet so far...

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